How to Meet Thai Girls in Chiang Mai

Chiang Mai is an amazing little city nestled between the lush mountains of Northern Thailand. It offers an interesting blend of traditional Thai culture and modern ways of life. Northern Thai women are equally amazing and culturally sophisticated. But how can you meet local Thai girls? Where to begin? Fear not, as this comprehensive guide will navigate you through the pitfalls of dating local Thai girls.

Five Pieces of Advice for Meeting Local Thai Girls

2. Learn basic Thai phrases: While many Thai people speak English, making an effort to learn some basic Thai phrases can show your sincerity and make communication easier. Simple greetings like “Sawasdee ka” (hello) and “Khor thot ka” (excuse me) can help break the ice.

3. Be patient: Thai girls appreciate foreigners who appear willing to be patient in public. Time works differently in Thailand. If you set up a time to meet, and she is late, which is pretty common, being patient and not showing any signs of fustration can help win her over. Also, take the time to get to know the girl as a person. Demonstrate honesty and sincerity and respect for her culture will make you comparably better in her eyes than most other foreigners.

4. Avoid overly aggressive dating approaches: Whether you meet a girl in a cafe, at a bar, or online, it is a good idea to be modest and indirect. Talking about sex is usually a big red flag for a Thai girl. Thai culture values subtlety and modesty, so overly aggressive or pushy behavior is seen as off-putting. Instead, opt for a friendly and respectful approach. Show interest, but also give them space and time to reciprocate.

5. Understand cultural differences: Be aware of cultural differences in dating customs and expectations. For example, public displays of affection are a lot less common in Thai culture compared to Western cultures. Take cues from your partner and respect their boundaries.

Meeting Thai Girls Online vs. Meeting Thai Girls in Cafes

In the semi-modern life of the 1990’s and early 2000’s before online dating exploded, people used to pick each other up in cafes and public places by making eye contact and small talk. While that’s always still an option (we are after all still in the physical world), online dating has become the normal way of dating in Thailand, even for the more conservative variety of Chiang Mai girls. Let’s compare some of the advantages and disadvantages of these two ways of picking up girls.

Picking up a girl in a cafe, restaurant, or on the street:

The advantages are obvious. While online dating can be tricky and deceptive, since you are not able to see the real person behind the pics and bio, picking up a girl in a public space has the advantage of your knowing what you are getting. You know right away, at least at a superficial level, that you like her, what she really looks like, sounds like, acts like. There may be more hidden behind her cafe pose, but at least you have the direct experience of meeting her in the real world.

But the disadvantages are obvious as well. You are not able to view the volume of people. You can’t scroll through and match with a girl. You also do not know if the girl sitting next you at the cafe is even single, is interested in you, is interested in anyone, or what not. It also takes guts and a hook to approach a girl in a cafe or on a train. There is a lot of randomness to it and rejection is frequent and stings more. More than this, meeting a Thai girl on site has the added problem of her “losing face” in public. If you are sitting in a cafe filled with local Thais, and you attempt to approach a pretty girl at a table across from you, others are looking and she knows this and might feel embarrassed and turned off by the seeming aggression of approaching her.

Meeting a girl online:

The good: There is a level of privacy to chatting online. You also know that the girl you are talking to wants to date either you or someone, or at least has made enough of an effort to do it by being on a dating site. Although you don’t get to see the person until you actually meet her for a date after chatting for a while, in a different sense you get to survey and choose between a lot of people. The magnitude of options, variety, and the rate of dates you can go on all multiply when online.

The bad:  Stereotypes abound. A girl, who might be very attracted to you if she were to meet you in public, might swipe left to you online because you are a year older than her ideal age range allows, or because you are not that photogenic, etc. Online dating can be frustratingly superficial and lead to bias and profiling.

Conclusion:

While there are disadvantages, online dating is a great way to meet local Chiang Mai girls. There are tons of attractive young Thai women on popular dating sites like Thaifriendly and Thaicupid. For a guide to online dating in Thailand and to Asia in general, check out my other posts.